I know these aren’t all ‘religions’ as such, but I couldn’t resist adding a few lines for the site re-launch

Taoism

Shit happens.

Hare Krishna

Shit happens Rama Ding Ding.

Hinduism

This shit happened before.

Islam

If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.

Zen

What is the sound of shit happening.

Buddhism

When shit happens, is it really shit.

Confucianism

Confucius say, “Shit happens.”

7th day Adventist

Shit happens on Saturdays.

Protestantism

Shit won’t happen if I work harder.

Jehovah’s Witness

Knock, knock “Shit happens.”

Unitarian

What is shit?

Mormon

Shit happens again & again & again.

Judaism

Oyvay! Why does this shit always happen to me?!

Pentecostalism

Praise the shit.

Atheism

There is no shit.

New age

Shit happens, and it happens to smell good.

Rastafarianism

Let’s smoke this shit!

Capitalism

How can we maximise the profit from this shit.

Conservatism

All shit is the fault of immigrants.

Liberalism

It’s shit, but we can reform it - let’s have a dialogue.

Anarchism

Cops… SHIT!!!!